SerenitySavage

I wonder when I learned to swim Sideways in that depressed ocean’s current Rather than gurgle the salty waves I wonder if you can still feel the energy That I throw into the universe Even when you close your world to me I wonder if I can write you Out of my existence Put the period on our sentence I wonder why I lay myself bare Only to be rejected By those that never even try to deserve me I wonder if the ghosts of a past me Will ever stop haunting my present Or holding me back from my future I wonder why I over analyze Every mundane human detail With my command of the language No wonder I am so inundated With all things rhetorical I am simply nothing short of Absolutely wonderful

To a few I’m the girl that got away Some think I have way too much to say There are those that will always want to know me While some have no capacity to see To him I might be an angry erratic artist To her a whitebread silver spoon racist To one I am everything he will ever need To another a companion used only to breed For some I will always be just out of reach For others I will never be a place to preach So you tell us which version of me Is the last one that you choose to see

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I-QfPUz1es8

We sent your blood to the wrong labs That’s two more weeks of suffering you will have We’re sorry there is nothing to fix this mistake Wait until next time, we’ll do it right, first rate It’s just a couple weeks of intensified disease You’ll be fine, it should be a breeze There is no retribution you can take You’ll even have to pay for our mistake So don’t get mad at our sloppy ineptitude You’re the only one here being rude Stress hurts your condition Breathe easy, lessen your tension

Content dies in a diamond ring The tent of the con A shield to protect Against the imminent disaster But who saves you When you lay yourself bare And they slice open your scars Sip from your leaking heart Demo women Demonstrate and demolish The demons of marriage Before you are disregarded Dissect the disingenuous It is our curse from birth Females feel it all too real You have to think proactively So that you get a head start Embolden your mind Suffocate your heart

I miss the heat of the flame We burned too brightly The fuse went out Prematurely Do you miss that fire? Crave a winter storm With swirling purple raindrops Were you even real? Or just another one of my many personalities Spawned to fall in love with myself I'll just wait for the next manifestation Of another perfect piece of me

It must be so hard To be a man Walking around with That dick in your pants You are a mess More than one, a bunch Your lies taste like candy I love the way they crunch A beautiful empty vessel I pour myself into you Only to seep through the cracks Soaking the floor beneath your shoes I would rather be alone Diseased, honest, and sick Than to hear one more lie Be played like a trick What do you do with The women you accumulate? You’ll never forget me? We never even went on a date Maybe you need a bartender or lawyer A supermodel, an artist, or a stripper I’ve decided that it won’t be me To try on your glass slipper Be on your way Prince Charming of Casanova I knew what you were from the start Nothing but a collector of hearts

I got the text around 5:00 a.m. It went something like, “I’m not coming home. I need some time to think. My phone will be off, but I will call to talk to the babies. Please don’t hate me. I hope we can still be friends”. That’s it. Fourteen years together, twelve of them married all reduced to one hollow text. He was leaving me. My fairytale romance quickly turned into a nightmare. For the months building up to that point, I had been struggling to stay afloat. We have three children together. The youngest are only fourteen months apart and I was the sole caregiver 99.99% of the time. I was losing my mind. Every day when my husband would leave to go to work at our Italian restaurant, I would cry. Every day. I didn’t want to be left alone with the kids, trapped in my own self pity and misery. I was never meant to be a stay at home mom. I wanted to work at the restaurant, too. That was also my dream, not just his, but he shamed me into staying home to raise them. “My mom did it, why c

There is no freedom in forever For never was there a more hateful word The blue has dripped from the sky Rained us out Colorless Each day you are gone It's like I've lost you For the tenth time The amount of loss not proportionate To our short moments together Pain scales in every hospital room Show one smiling face turning into one of agony One through ten How bad does it hurt If there were love scales Ours have started to tip A starry eyed lover turning to tears One through ten Medicate accordingly I thought you were the whole ocean But you were just a creek That wet my socks My color is bleeding through again Deep violet ruby Something you could never dream

The Emergency Room is every chronically ill person's worst nightmare and last resort. When you are sick enough to require an ambulance ride, the last thing you want to have to worry about is whether or not the medical professionals will believe you once you get there. There are times when answers are not immediately apparent. This space in between the onset of symptoms and diagnosis is when people with a chronic disease suffer the most for a variety of reasons. The opioid crisis in our country has America on edge, and for good reason. I personally know of at least four former friends in my life that have died from overdoses in just the past two years. Everyone has been touched by the disease of addiction in one way or another. I, however, am not a junkie, as any administered hospital drug test will conclude. That doesn't stop the nurses and doctors from assuming I am a drug seeker before they even know my history. I have been left for hours, curled up in a fetal position on