Animal Magnetism

I tried to live my life like a cat
Sleeping sixteen hours a day
The damn kids yank my tail, dress me up
And the end of my nine lives is on the way

I tried to live my life like a dog
Hanging my head out the window
But bees flew in my mouth
Before I was abandoned on skid row

I tried to live my life like a beaver
Chewing down the hardest wood I could find
But I got splinters in my lips
And a stick to the eye left me blind

I tried to live my life like a snake
Spitting venom in the face of my enemies
But I got stuck in some bird netting
And the pigeons started to peck at me

I tried to live my life like a goldfish
Swimming in repetitive circles
But my bowl sprung a leak
And I got air in my gills

I tried to live my life like a bear
Growling at those who got too close
But I was caught by a tranquilizer dart
And now I'm held captive, for pictures I pose

Of all the things I've tried to be
The one thing left to try is being me

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