Childbirth Unspoken

Swollen tender breasts
A twinge of nausea
Extra bathroom breaks
The first symptoms
of the precarious condition
A human incubator
Ravenous and moody
Weeks of tests to follow
Glucose tolerance
Trisomy 18
Triple screen
Sound waves create a premature image

On to weight gain and stretch marks
The pit stop and road map of the state
Indigestion induces involuntary vomit
Water retention fattens face and feet
The day will soon come,
but first try to sleep!
Uterine convulsions harden
Squeezing life
The cervix ripens and thins
A one woman birthing show now begins

The sound of life reverberates
Underwater heart thuds
A catheter is threaded
Into the spine
Intentionally
Causing partial paralysis
Causing partial pain relief
Waiting for the order to push
Waiting to deliver

Involuntary bowel movements
Wiped up discreetly by a nurse
Blood vessels bulge
where the sun don't shine
Hug the back of your knees
and squeeze
Breathe
Squeeze
Rip from vagina to anus
So much fluid
Life pours out into waiting arms
Whisked away for its own first tests

Uncontrollable shivering
Teeth chattering euphoria
While stitches fix gaping holes
Finally the last life house is delivered
A placenta good enough to eat
Now left to bleed for about six weeks
A frozen diaper pad, mesh underwear
and a slightly deflated lumpy midsection
The first ensemble of motherhood

Foggy is the first week
Full of advice and suggestions
A mother-in-law with her
eagle eye of judgement
Crashing hormones and leaky breasts
This is what a woman waits for
Smile! It's the best time of your life!
Risking death only to gain
something you have no idea what to do with
Sleep deprivation brings the brink of insanity
Congratulations Mommy!
Aren't you just so happy!?

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